"How Green IS Your Grass?"

How many Lifetime movies have you seen where the main character is granted the opportunity to go back in time and change some things? Many times, the opportunity is presented to the protagonist on the heels of what seemed to be a failing relationship or a mid-life crisis that arrived just before mid-life and wanted to linger beyond it.

If given the opportunity to travel back in time, what would you change?

Would you marry that fine, chocolate hunk of a man whose biceps were as large as telephone poles and who smelled like masculinity to the tenth power? Or would you marry that caramel-colored woman whose body was built by Mattel© and who had the brain power of a nuclear physicist?

I know, I know . . . he promised you a five-bedroom home complete with a wrap-around porch, a two-car garage AND two cars. That ranch style home with two bedrooms "ain't what you signed up for!" And what about her? She was supposed to remain a size 6 and the two of you should be making love at least three times a week. These days, she can barely stuff herself into a size 14, and sex three times a week? Forget about it! If you manage to steal a glimpse of her getting ready for work, you MIGHT see her breasts on Tuesdays!

"I should have married someone else!"

Oh really? And what would you do with that someone else? The grass may look greener on the other side, but you never know what dangers are lying in that grass . . . You had no idea that the chocolate, hunk of a man you thought was so sexy was actually on the down-low, did you? Or that the fine, little brick house you would have given your entire paycheck to was strung out on drugs and would steal the weave off of her own mother's head if only she could find that one loose track. But, if you would dare to care for your own lawn . . . water it, nurture it, enrich the soil when need be, protect it from visitors who carelessly trample through it, you would see your grass growing greener by the proverbial minute!

Don't waste your time wondering what could have been. Invest your time in what is! You "IS" married! There is a God-given grace upon your life to be married to your spouse and to be happily married. Don't frustrate that grace by looking over the fence at someone else's grass. It's probably fake grass, anyway.

Instead, be honest with God, first. Share your frustrations with Him and then ask Holy Spirit to guide you in sharing your concerns with your spouse. And then . . . work on it. Use the strategies Holy Spirit has shared with you both and begin employing them. And in case you didn't know, there's no shame in asking for help.

A good, Christian marriage counselor always carries a green crayon in their back pocket.